Monday, March 19, 2012

It's a Mad, Mad World...

Well it's just a mad, mad world, isn't it?

Little did I know when I wrote that last post (which was really depressing...sorry about that) that I was 4 days pregnant.

Jesse and I have tried to get pregnant for 4 years and obviously hadn't been having much luck.

We were going to start the adoption process in the next year or so. I wasn't too stressed about it. I just wanted to get the Graves Disease taken care of and then we'd get the ball rolling on having a baby.

When I found out I was pregnant I was overwhelmed. I read up on babies born to mothers with un-treated Graves Disease and the odds of my little babe being born with Graves Disease was extremely high. I just felt so guilty that I was going to make this innocent little baby go through so much. But Jesse gave me a blessing and it said that this baby was coming when it was supposed to and that it would have extra protection in my belly. And that everything would be fine. So when I think about it too much or start feeling guilty I just re-read my journal entry from the night Jesse gave me the blessing and the anxiety is lessened.

Since then, we have found out that we are having a boy! And he is growing healthy and strong. And everything looks "normal" as far as they can tell. I can't tell you what a relief it all is.

I am 24 weeks and I am still sicker than a dog. But I don't care as long as this little boy continues to grow healthy and strong. I will go through whatever I have to if it means he can have a healthy and strong body. I pray every day that he will.

I am still scared to death to be a mom, and I don't know if I'll ever be ready, but I am so grateful that I am pregnant and that the Lord has blessed me with so much!


Down By the Bey's said...

First off-I'm so excited for you! I don't think anyone ever feels "ready" to be a mom, but I know you will be AMAZING! I will definitely praying for both you and your little baby. I'm so sorry things have been so rough with your pregnancy and in general. You are one tough chick! I hope that you start to have some good days mixed in with the sick days. I miss you! Congratulations Chels!

Codi said...

Congrats on the baby boy!!! I am happy to hear that he is growing healthy! Sorry to hear that you are still feeling sick. That is the worst:(

Perschon Family said...

yay for you guys having a little boy! i'm so sorry you are still so sick!!! good luck getting through this last part! you're getting close!!

Angela said...

I am so excited that you are having a boy. You guys will be such great parents. I don't think anyone is ready to be a parent but the great part is your kids love you even if you make mistakes. Sorry you are still sick, that is rough. Think about the sweet baby you will get in the end. Congrats!

Britt said...

I realize this is an old post but I just wanted to say you are awesome and I am so excited for you guys!