A sad day...

Today is a sad day. It's not the end of the world. And I am grateful that I do not have thyroid cancer, but today I had some scary news confirmed.

I have Graves Disease.

And I think they couldn't have given the disease a scarier name.

I will see an Endocrinologist in 2 weeks and we will decide whether to do radioactive treatments to pretty much kill my thyroid or if we should completely remove it.

To be completely honest I would rather get the stupid thing out so that the worst parts of this incurable auto-immune disease would be stopped in their tracks, but we shall see what he has to say.

But for today I am going to cry a bit and let myself feel sorry for this crap that has been put on my plate.

And tomorrow I will move on and be positive.

Overwhelmed...

Today I had to wait 2 hours to find out if I had Thyroid cancer. Those were some of the worst 2 hours of my life.

After waiting those 2 hours I went into my Doctor's office and he said he is "extremely confident" that I do not have cancer. I can't tell you the overwhelming joy I felt when those words came out of his mouth.

I am going in for a thyroid ultra-sound in an hour to see if there are any growths on my thyroid. They believe it is shutting down. My sister Marissa had half of her thyroid removed a few years ago and has had no problems since, so let's hope I am in the same boat as her.

I just had to post and say how grateful I am. Some days are extremely hard and I have been pretty sick lately, but I am so grateful that my illnesses are not going to make me leave this earth anytime soon. I am also grateful for my amazing boss, my amazing husband (who changed his flight to come home early from a work trip as soon as I called him and told him that I might have cancer...he is ALWAYS so good to me, but it's times like this that I am reminded of his devotion to me...and of mine to him), for my Megs...she takes more stress & pain from me than I probably even know...and for my cute Mom who has the busiest life & doesn't have a moment for herself, but she is always willing to drop ANYTHING to be by my side.

I am overwhelmed and grateful.

Crohn's Disease Article

My mom sent this article to me and it made me cry. The way the lady in the article explains the way Crohn's controls her life is exactly how I feel and it was nice to hear someone else take the words right out of my mouth.

I also appreciate that there are doctors out there searching for the cause of Crohn's so they can help cure it so that people like me can live life more fully without wondering when the next flare up will be and how long it will last. I am so grateful that I live in this day and time when I can get the help I need and continue to have hope. I am also very grateful that none of my cousins, siblings, parents, or aunts and uncles have this disease as far as we know (the article talks about one family in which several cousins have the disease and I hope my family continues to not share in this statistic).

If any of you haven't heard my Crohn's story and want to know more I am always willing to talk about it. Leave me a comment if you have questions or if you want to hear more. I am not going to write it all down here unless I feel like people would actually want to hear it.

Thanks for listening to me...

Here's the article from the Deseret News:

Discovery of 'hitchhiking' gene at University of Utah could bring scientists one step closer to defeating Crohn's disease

SALT LAKE CITY — It began with a stomach ache when Charlotte Shragge was in her 20s.

At the time, she thought it was due to the poor diet of a typical college student. But then it got worse.

"I started getting sick and having a lot of digestive issues," she said. "It got to the point that I didn't even go out in public, it was so debilitating. I really didn't feel safe leaving home and not knowing where I could find the next restroom."

Her parents took her to a doctor and she was ultimately diagnosed with Crohn's disease, a debilitating and painful chronic bowel disorder that affects an estimated 700,000 people in the United States.

Scientists believe there is a genetic link to the disease, but finding a cure remains elusive because its cause is thought to be linked to as many as 70 different genes. One Utah doctor believes his research may bring scientists one small step closer to reaching a better understanding of the causes of Crohn's, and hopefully closer to a cure.

Now 37, Shragge treats her disease with a variety of drugs, monitoring her stress, and staying away from certain foods when she has a flareup. Still, drugs lose their effectiveness over time and she must be re-evaluated for new ones. Flareups can come on suddenly and can last anywhere from a week to as long as four months.

"Having a chronic disease can be a bit of a roller coaster. I've had long periods of feeling great and I've had other periods of feeling just downright ill, and wondering what the next step is," Shragge said. It's not uncommon for body fatigue and joint pain to settle in as well.

"We've looked at Crohn's disease recurrence in families," said Dr. Stephen Guthery, an associate professor of pediatrics at the University of Utah who also treats Crohn's patients at Primary Children's Medical Center. Guthery said the link among family members is evidence of a genetic risk for Crohn's.

Shragge said after being diagnosed she discovered she had several cousins who also had the condition. She said she recently lost a cousin who suffered from chronic ulcerative colitis and succumbed to colon cancer. She said she wanted to share her story in order to spread awareness.

"It's not something that I'm going to hide or be ashamed of," she said.

There are genetic risk factors for a variety of diseases, such as heart disease or obesity. Guthery said with Crohn's there are believed to be around 70 identified genetic risk factors, making it an extremely complex condition to understand.

Taking samples of 100 Utah Crohn's patients, as part of over 1,800 patients across the country and in Russia, Guthery and his group traced protein levels to their genetic origins. What they found was a history that went back as far as the first humans to grow domesticated crops. In a study published this month in the British journal Molecular Biology and Evolution, Guthery and a team of other researchers traced the early origins of a key digestive gene. What they found was that genetic mutations that allowed early humans to better digest domestic crops had a "hitchhiker" gene that contributes to Crohn's.

"Our work suggests that one genetic mutation in this region became common in Europeans because it was beneficial, and that neighboring disease-causing genetic changes hitchhiked and became more common," Guthery said.

The story actually goes back further to the Fertile Crescent area, which is now parts of Iraq, Iran and Israel. Early crops, such as lentils, peas, wheat and barley, were low in the amino acid ergothioneine and humans genetically adapted to better digest the food. However, other mutations also took place.
"In this case, we think an adaptation to a transient change in diet around 12,000 years ago resulted in a genetic predisposition of Crohn's disease that is present in about half of all Europeans today," said Chad Huff, the study's lead author and human genetics research fellow at the U.

"We feel that we're getting closer," Guthery said.

Meanwhile, people like Shragge manage their condition with drugs, diet and exercise. Shragge admits that one of her favorite foods is Mexican. When her condition is dormant, she can handle it just fine, but it's always taking a chance.

"It really is kind of like playing Russian roulette," she said.

I am looking forward to:

For those of you that don't know, I am going to be in The Wizard of Oz at The Grand Theater in Salt Lake City. I am so excited to be in a show again. The Wizard of Oz isn't my favorite musical in the whole world, but it will be fun none-the-less. I can't wait to sing and dance and act again. It is so nice to pretend to be someone else for a while and I can't wait for rehearsals to start. I am sure I will be tired and sometimes I will wonder why in the heck I signed up for it, but I am so excited for all of the fun things that come along with being in a show!

Random Allergic Reaction...

A week ago I got back from lunch and while I worked at my desk I felt my lip begin to swell a little bit. For those of you who know me, you might know that sometimes my lips swell when my Crohn's is flaring up, but when it happens it only happens to my bottom lip.

The swelling last week was to my top lip. It felt hot and itchy, but I took one Benadryl and thought that would take care of it.

3 hours later I was pretty uncomfortable, but I figured it would just go away.

I went to our Young Women's activity in which we were going to weed one of our neighbor's yards since she recently had knee surgery and couldn't kneel down and pull weeds. While at the activity my throat felt like it was swelling up, but again, I tried to put it out of my mind.

Soon it was bad enough that I excused myself from the activity and headed home. I took 2 Benadryl tablets and 30 minutes later my lip was so swollen that it had several blood blisters underneath the skin and I couldn't swallow.

Jesse was with the Scouts swimming so I couldn't get a hold of him to see if he thought I should head into the E.R.

I didn't call Meg yet because I knew she would tell me to go right away and I needed a calm person to tell me what to do (I appreciate that Meg is so protective, but I didn't want to spend money on the E.R. if I didn't have to)...so I called my sweet friend Tara who is a nurse and told her what was going on. She was home with her kids and she said, "I am coming over right now. You can't be alone. You need to go to the E.R. and I will come be with you until you go just in case." I got emotional of course (I am emotional in general...I know, surprise, surprise, but I get really emotional when I don't feel well and people are sweet to me).

I told her not to worry since it was so late and that I would walk over to my neighbor's house and be with them until I could get a hold of Jesse. And so I walked over to the Seethalers. They happened to be outside and as soon as Manon saw me she stopped what she was doing and said she wanted to take me to the E.R.

We called Meg and Jesse and told them which E.R. I was headed to and we were off.

Manon and I are great friends, but we are SO different. The whole car ride I was a little on edge, but Manon helped me feel like everything was going to be OK. She kept my mind occupied and helped me laugh a bit, which I appreciated more than she will ever know.

We got to the E.R. and they took me back right away. The nurse who took care of me that night was so much fun. I appreciate it when I get medical professionals that are not tight-laced. I am so dramatic that I need the people around me to be at ease and to understand that I am making jokes because I am scared to death. Anyway, the nurse and the doctor were both so sweet to me the whole night and took such good care of me.

This is getting long, so I will try and sum up the rest of it....

They gave me an Epi shot and some other meds through an I.V. After the pain subsided a bit and I could breath easier I looked down and noticed that my feet were SO DIRTY. They were BLACK. I didn't realize that when I was weeding in flip-flops my feet had been covered in dirt. As soon as I saw it I said, "Look at my feet! They look horrible" and Manon started laughing. The doctor said he thought I probably had a shopping cart outside because I looked like a homeless person. It was a funny distraction and when Meg walked in I asked her to wash them for me (Manon would've done it if I asked but I was too embarrassed to ask her to do it).

As I stated before, I am extremely emotional when I am sick and seeing Meg wash my feet made me get choked up. It just reminded me of Christ. And it was so sweet to sit in a room with one of my best friends, my twin, and my husband and realize how blessed I am. I am so grateful that I have so many people around me who serve me continually. I do have random crap happen to me, but I am one of the luckiest people in the world and I appreciate the abundant blessings the Lord gives to me.

Sometimes I recognize these things at the oddest times, but it made the night so much easier when I sat back and realized how fortunate I am.

To close, I am feeling better. I felt funny for a few days and sometimes I had a hard time breathing and swallowing...and I looked like I had been punched in the face 50 times for about 2 days but it has gone away now and I am planning on never having a random allergic reaction again!

Thanks for listening peeps...and thanks to Tara, Manon, Meg and Jesse for taking such good care of me!

Sweet Tara (Tara...I stole this off your blog...)

Fabulous Manon...(and her hubby Jake...who was sweet enough to put the kids to bed while Manon sat with me in the E.R. for 5 hours)

And you know these kids...they are the center of my world...